[REVIEW] 5oz Hamburger with Cheese / Spuntino / Soho, London
But the fiddling is worth it. The patty is intriguing.
We’ve been wanting to go here for ages. Like, since forever.
I’ve lost count of the amount of times I’ve bowled past Spuntino and had a look in, only to see the standard half an hour queue of eager diners-to-be standing behind, and wistfully peering over the shoulders of those who are being fed. It must be in the dozens. It always looks loud, dark and obviously, a bit of a tight squeeze.
Ambling past at 3.15pm on a breezy Tuesday afternoon, I peer in and see it empty. I subdue my Christmas morning face and sit down immediately. Clearly a different vibe during the day; it was bright, with chuggy folk rock bouncing round the room.
It’s immediately perfect; I’m up at the bar, diner-style filter coffee in hand, happy before I’ve eaten anything.
Once a secret menu item, but not now clearly, I ordered the burger with cheese. Everyone around me chose the oft-lauded sliders. If I’d had a bigger appetite, I’d have done the same.
Served similarly to the Joe Allen burger, it’s sauceless with red onion slices and pickle spears on the side. The construction, a chunky round patty that needs skewering to keep in place, makes it a troublesome bugger to add the desired ingredients to and condiment up.
But the fiddling is worth it. The patty is intriguing. With a really deep meatiness, it might actually be a hamburger: I swear I got a hint of chorizo spiciness in the mix of flavours, and on closer inspection there’s some kind of dark red meaty stripe through the middle. This could be wildly incorrect though.
The impeccably melted cheese is slathered all over, its gummy, elastic greatness, giving just the right amount of cheesy-goo-chew. And the bun wraps it all in a substantial, squishy, chew. It was great.
There is loads of great looking stuff on the menu that I want to try, so more late lunches here will be on the cards. I’m just hoping that late lunches don’t become a thing with everyone, because I think quiet, thoughtful Spuntino time is brilliant.
- Rob.
★[REVIEW] MEATliquor / London
He’s selling something we all really missed without knowing it: a proper hamburger.
If you haven’t been yet, you’ve read about it, or been told about MEATliquor.
It’s become synonymous with the new wave of London eating, and this widespread recognition has been hadron-collider-fast.
We’d had a few chats with co-founder Yianni on our many, many visits through the /wagon and /easy days, so when we heard that MEATliquor would be coming soon, we altercated at length about what it would be, and what we hoped it would be: a place having the hallmarks of a proper American dive bar (darkness, redness, occasionally shirty service and loud music), but in London, that served all the meticulously researched and recreated Americana of the previous MEATporiums.
The food
The Meatwagon / Meateasy classics are there, and they are, for the most part, sublime: The Bacon Cheeseburger is an art form in itself, and a must-order on a first visit. These are take ‘em as they come, greasy, juicy, messy beasts. Likewise with the saucy, tacky chilli cheese fries, which balance the not too saucy chilli with the gloopy cheese, made in such a way that they coat the fries without making them soggy. Cheesy alchemy.
The Mac ‘n cheese has had a revamp and the new model is now saucier, and dirty-cheesier than before; exceptional. Forks will clash.
And some new dishes are stealing the limelight too, like the fried pickles, which are a tangy-crunch slap in the face, or the buffalo chicken burger which is flat-out phenomenal - like a mahoosive boneless buffalo wing, in a bun.
Timing is Everything
Consistency, or indeed the lack of it, appears to be putting first-timers off a bit (if the twittersphere is anything to go by).
We have to admit, it has happened to us too.
Our first experience of the newly added Mushroom Swiss was disappointing - the meat had not been seasoned and the mildness of the Swiss cheese and mushrooms resulted in a blandness that not even the red onions and extra pickle could save. But on second tasting a much better job had been done and it tasted pretty decent, although it’s still one of the lesser burgers in their ever increasing repertoire. A friend of B/A shared a similar experience, where a Dead Hippie was missing key ingredients.
The Queue
It’s fucking long, it starts early and it’s a clear deterrent. But let’s get some perspective.
If you’ve been to San Francisco in the last few years and tried to visit any of the popular restaurants, then you’ll know first hand what queues can be. You queue for brunch, for coffee, for sandwiches, hell, even for ice cream. The same thing happens in Foursquare paradise New York City. Just take Shake Shack in Madison Square Park. It’s the new cultural barometer for good chow: if there’s a queue outside, it’s probably worth queuing for. Remember the Long Table Market in Dalston before Christmas? Yeah.
ML takes the same approach. The only genuine gripe is the setup doesn’t suit it. Were it a classic fast food joint then things would work better; more covers would be in and out and the overall atmosphere would be less flustered. The choice of it being like a dive bar, but in reality being a restaurant, makes for a culture clash that makes it neither. You can’t finish up your food and while away the evening working your way down the impressive cocktail list without feeling a bit guilty for all those queued up in the cold outside.
It doesn’t bother us too much, since we’ve always taken an ‘eat and get the hell out’ approach with ML and the #MEATEASY before it. A quick scan around the room though and you can tell that Londoners want to linger, or at least spend as much time inside as they did in the queue.
But what does it all mean?
MEATliquor is a compilation restaurant. A greatest hits.
It imitates the best of what Yianni has had in America and recreates it for London. He is the ultimate English fanboy of American food. The crusader that actually does his fucking research, goes in the kitchen and reproduces what he liked over there as best he can.
There aren’t any original dishes here. The bacon cheeseburger’s roots are from Hodad’s in San Diego (see our review). The deep fried pickles are a mainstay in diners across the West coast. The chilli burger is an interpretation of the Bobcat Burger from Bobcat Bite in New Mexico. The buffalo wings are, well, buffalo wings. There’s even talk of jalapeño poppers - another classic bar food being tested for the recently confirmed second venue, MEATmarket, in Covent Garden.
To be clear, these greasy facsimiles are No Bad Thing. In fact, it’s not been done successfully before, which is a large part of explaining their success. Every ‘American’ burger joint has been a parody run by people who don’t seem to have ever eaten a sandwich in America. And then there’s your stubbornly English burgers, doled out by the likes of Byron, Giraffe and gastropubs up and down the Northern line. But they are still stiff-upper-lipped versions of a Yankee Doodle archetype. Unlike its rivals, Meatliquor is not designed to please everyone. Yianni is a master craftsman of some of the most iconic dishes America has to offer, and judging by our experience on both sides of the pond, it’s not preposterous to say he would be considered that in America too. He’s selling something we all really missed without knowing it: a proper hamburger.
The Future
MEATmarket’s announcement confirms they’ve proven their market and can keep going from here. All of the MEATenterprises have benefited from a hyper-connected, drooling, price conscious fanbase, and their slow but sure approach to growth will stand them in good stead.
The implications for the London restaurant scene are already unfolding: the queues at Pitt Cue down the road, residencies from foodtrucks in pubs (like Lucky Chip at the Sebright Arms, or Kimchi Cult at the Rose & Crown in Walthamstow). The long-established faux diners are desperately trying to change their menus to resemble something similar (and actually authentic) so they can compete - they didn’t pull their tube socks up quickly enough. Nobody is talking about The Diner, or Ed’s Easy Diner. Byron continue to expand aggressively into every corner of London they possibly can and risk becoming the Pizza Express poster-child of burgers.
The restaurant groups must be scratching their heads still; the buzz Yianni and Scott can generate without expensive PR agencies fudging it for them must be annoying for the well-funded big guns. It’s not a big secret though: all you need is a good product.
But what of the ‘wagon?
The big difference between us and America is the upgrade path. The dream here is different. Compare the successful foodtrucks of Los Angeles and you get a different picture - they’re proud of their mobility. If anything, their strategy is more trucks in more locations. Kogi BBQ is the shining example of this. Their daily matrix of serving locations covers the entire LA Metro area. It’s quite the operation.
London is not blessed with the same mercifully laid back food trading laws. And that’s why a proper home makes sense. But we’re sad the ‘wagon has disappeared from view. Here’s hoping it reappears again this summer.
We bloody love what they’re doing. Shocker, huh? Had we the time, money and inclination, it’s exactly what we would do too. It’s having a domino effect on the quality of American food across the South East, and it’ll be interesting to see if the influence reaches beyond the M25.
The name of this very blog means we’re inherently biased, but we don’t think burgers are a trend. We’ve always loved burgers; since we were tiny, and we always will. It’s just that the good ones were something you’d only ever get on holiday. To use marketing wonk-speak, that’s the gamechanger here. Timing is everything, and Yianni continues to get his freakishly right.
MEATliquor is our version of Arnold’s - the first port of call whenever a meeting place is required anywhere in the vicinity of Central London. We’ll go there for ALL of the food, some of the food, or only for drinks - even if it means having to buy the cheapest thing on the menu to meet their have-to-order-food-to-drink license. The only bone of contention is who gets to be the Fonz…
We like it, you might not. We’ll see you in there.
- Simon & Rob.
![[REVIEW] Bacon Maple Doughnut / Gourdough’s / Austin, TX
We flew Continental to Texas and during the Transatlantic part, when we were at our most bored, Mrs D and I watched one of the random TV shows they had on the seatback video system things. Flying Continental to Texas is great by the way: all the stewardesses look like the Mum or Aunts from the first two Home Alone movies.
Anyway, we’ve seen all the movies so we’ve moved on to this show about foodtrucks. Some Travel Channel thingy. Very on topic. In Austin there was a piece about Gourdough’s, and we watched it open-mouthed. They make the biggest, most incredible looking doughnuts you’ve ever seen. There was this one with bacon on it.
Once in Austin, and having realised the usual Gourdough’s spot was too far away from downtown to get there, we resigned ourselves to not visiting. But because SXSW was happening, those savvy Manhattanites Squarespace had hired their own foodtruck, with a different local foodtruck providing free food each day, just round the corner from the Convention Center.
And, lo, we did see that Gourdough’s were there, and that they were serving up the famous bacon maple doughnuts we’d seen on the plane. And they were free and they were called ‘The Flying Pig’. God bless the internet.
On picking up the box, the first surprise is how light it is. The Gourdough’s doughnut looks like something that could destroy you from the inside out, but the batter is deceptively light and fluffy, and delicately fried. The maple butter and crispy bacon give a perfect salty crunch to each bite.
If your doughnut experience doesn’t extend beyond Gregg’s and those slightly cold, stale Krispy Kremes that all get made in Essex, then Gourdough’s will be otherworldly in its goodness.
Absolutely a must-visit if you love doughnuts. We’ll be going back for the proper truck experience next time.
Simon.](http://www.tumblr.com/photo/1280/burgeranarchy/17610328699/1/tumblr_lze5rqd7ay1qh62x4)
[REVIEW] Bacon Maple Doughnut / Gourdough’s / Austin, TX
We flew Continental to Texas and during the Transatlantic part, when we were at our most bored, Mrs D and I watched one of the random TV shows they had on the seatback video system things. Flying Continental to Texas is great by the way: all the stewardesses look like the Mum or Aunts from the first two Home Alone movies.
Anyway, we’ve seen all the movies so we’ve moved on to this show about foodtrucks. Some Travel Channel thingy. Very on topic. In Austin there was a piece about Gourdough’s, and we watched it open-mouthed. They make the biggest, most incredible looking doughnuts you’ve ever seen. There was this one with bacon on it.
Once in Austin, and having realised the usual Gourdough’s spot was too far away from downtown to get there, we resigned ourselves to not visiting. But because SXSW was happening, those savvy Manhattanites Squarespace had hired their own foodtruck, with a different local foodtruck providing free food each day, just round the corner from the Convention Center.
And, lo, we did see that Gourdough’s were there, and that they were serving up the famous bacon maple doughnuts we’d seen on the plane. And they were free and they were called ‘The Flying Pig’. God bless the internet.
On picking up the box, the first surprise is how light it is. The Gourdough’s doughnut looks like something that could destroy you from the inside out, but the batter is deceptively light and fluffy, and delicately fried. The maple butter and crispy bacon give a perfect salty crunch to each bite.
If your doughnut experience doesn’t extend beyond Gregg’s and those slightly cold, stale Krispy Kremes that all get made in Essex, then Gourdough’s will be otherworldly in its goodness.
Absolutely a must-visit if you love doughnuts. We’ll be going back for the proper truck experience next time.
- Simon.
[REVIEW] [Bacon Cheeseburger & Ortega Chili Burger / Kua ‘Aina / Soho, London
“As a certified US import we were pretty darn excited.”
Despite looking like a cafe that an eccentric old Londoner had decorated after being inspired on a recent ‘Polynesian Dreams’ cruise, Kua’ Aina is a renowned chain that’s been banging out burgers in Hawaii since 1975.
What Kua ‘Aina nicely summarises is the multitude of problems the American export has to face. Since we’re a scarcity-fuelled bunch, you can look at the list of chains that have jumped the pond and draw a few conclusions. To pull out a few examples:
- TGI Fridays. Not really any different to how it is in the States, but we’d much prefer it to be a Cheesecake Factory. Or a Bennigan’s (RIP).
- Taco Bell. The few franchisees who have taken the risk have stuck to the out of town locations (ie. Lakeside), and all they have to do is rehydrate some stuff that comes in boxes anyway.
- Wendy’s. Tried in the 90s, failed, then left. Arguably they’d probably be doing quite well if they came back now.
- Carl’s Jr. Oft-rumoured. Zero brand recognition on this side of the pond. Why bother?
- In-n-Out / Shake Shack / Five Guys - breathless tweets from those in the know often fuel speculation that they’re ‘looking for sites in Soho’ or some other horseshit. Whatever.
And the problems they face if and when they do come over are plentiful. First of all there’s a totally different type of consumer with their own idea of what a burger should be. Then you’ve got a different set of supply chain hurdles: price, quality and geography can ruin you. The sheer thought of, say, the Cheesecake Factory invading us with their pricing and portioning strategies and somehow keeping it profitable is enough to make your head spin.
Those that rely on actual cooking could be in a bit of trouble.
So on to Kua ‘Aina. As a certified US import we were pretty darn excited. Seating upstairs is a tight squeeze, like Ryanair overhead compartment tight. But hey, it’s got seating, and a downstairs area too, and the staff were delivering food quickly despite the lack of space.
The 1/2lb Bacon Cheese and 1/3lb Ortega Chili Burger arrived promptly, but were sorry looking specimens indeed - the cheese that presented itself had barely melted, was pale, and sweatier than The Rock in Fast Five1. The peppers atop the Chili burger appeared deflated and apologetic.
And they were small. So very small.
Also, you’ll notice, they had been served open. Mayo generously slathered on the top bun. Now, Rob is immediately confused. He’s been served an open burger, with one condiment added, but other condiments placed suggestively on the table. We know what a pedant he is.
No hesitation, the Heinz and French’s went straight on. Even then, they’re not particularly attractive. The dusty black char look ominous, and the tightly seeded buns are tough to cut.
But looks aren’t everything, so we persevered. It didn’t get much better. Whilst the 1/2lb patty was okay, the 1/3 pounder was covered with a thick gnarly crust that left an all-consuming burnt taste. Possibly a victim of the two-different-sizes-but-same-grilling-time issue, we pontificate. The bacon was rock solid and near on impossible to bite through, with whole chunks forcibly removing themselves in the first mouthful. The bun is too dense and the seeds go straight between your teeth, where they will then stay for for the rest of the afternoon.
The word ‘chili’ in the description of the other offering takes you down a bit of a false alley, as there was not an ounce of heat in the burger at all. However, having read up on Ortega chilis now that’s not surprising. The lack of any flavour from the pepper was just as disappointing, as its only purpose was as an unnecessary layer of squish. No cheese either.
The liberal mayo smothering tries to cover many of the sins going on here, much in the same way a cheap fast food burger does from Sonic or Wendy’s or Carl’s Jr. The problem is the overall package doesn’t deliver the same salty, stodgy, satisfying hit.
We don’t revel in being negative, but there were few redeeming features to what we ate at Kua ‘Aina. As we looked around though, the club sandwiches we spied looked immense. Intrigue alone (OK, and greed) will probably get us back here to sample those.
The other conclusion is that maybe we just ordered badly. Perhaps if you roll your own instead of opting for a pre-packaged menu option, your experience may vary.
- Simon & Rob.
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You should see it. It’s actually great. The Rock spends all his screen time dripping everywhere. ↩
[PREVIEW] The 1/3lb Bacon Cheeseburger from Kua’Aina, Soho
Yes, that is quite a char isn’t it…
[RECIPE] The Default Burger Anarchy Bun
Burger buns. So many different types. So many ways they can go very, very wrong.
Anyone remember that whole ‘Artisan-style Ciabatta’ debacle a while back? You catch my drift.
Most depressing of all is the bloody awful selection we get from the majority of our supermarkets and bakeries. Typically we have to suffer the following:
- The humble white bap. A moisture-sucking floury roll that capitulates like an over-dunked Malted Milk in the face of burger juice
- The crusty cob. A roof-of-mouth torturer.
And don’t even get me started on what they call burger buns, you may as well enclose your burger in two bits of fucking balsa wood.
Faced with this, I’ve tested various recipes over the last few months; from simple buns, to classic hamburger buns, to more fiddly potato rolls. More recently, with the increasing popularity of them at burger joints in London, I’ve had a go at differing brioche recipes too.
After finding some way too buttery or too sweet, I finally found this recipe.
And it’s a doozy, yielding light, beautifully textured buns, with that impressive shiny orange dome. Ever since, I’ve been using this for all of our burger experimentations, (including our Super Bowl Bacon Double Cheese, and the mini-concoctions for our rockumental burger fondue).
Give them a go, the prep is fiddly as fuck, but it delivers a very impressive cache of buns at the end, and they will give you results better than in most restaurants.
Brioche Burger Buns
Makes 10-12 4(ish) inch buns
- 3 tablespoons warm milk
- 2 teaspoons active dry yeast
- 2 1/2 tablespoons sugar
- 2 large eggs
- 3 cups strong bread flour
- 1/3 cup all-purpose flour
- 1 1/2 teaspoons salt
- 2 1/2 tablespoons unsalted butter, softened
- Sesame seeds (optional)
In a glass measuring cup, combine one cup warm water, the milk, yeast and sugar. Let it stand until nice n’ foamy, about ten minutes.
Beat one egg.
In a large bowl, whisk flours with salt. Gradually add butter and rub into the flour between your fingers, making crumbs. Using a dough scraper, stir in yeast mixture and your beaten egg until a dough forms. Scrape the dough onto a clean, well-floured counter and knead, scooping dough up, slapping it on counter and turning it, until smooth and elastic. I do it for 12-14 minutes. The dough will be on the sticky side, so it can be hella messy and will stick to your hands, the kitchen cupboards, the cat, hell, everywhere. But keep in mind that the more flour you knead in, the tougher the buns will be.
Shape the dough into a ball and return it back to bowl. Cover bowl with plastic wrap and let rise in a warm place until doubled in bulk, between one to two hours.
Line a baking sheet with parchment paper. Using dough scraper, divide dough into 10-12 equal parts. Gently roll each into a ball, place on the baking sheet and then swish down a bit with the palm of your hand, ideally they should be two to three inches apart on the sheet. Cover loosely with a piece of plastic wrap lightly coated in nonstick spray/sunflower oil and let buns rise in a warm place for one to two hours.
Set a large shallow pan of water on oven floor. Preheat oven to 205 degrees celsius with the rack in the middle. Beat the remaining egg with one tablespoon of water and brush some on top of buns. If you want sesame seeds on them, lob them on top now. I don’t, typically. Bake, turning sheet halfway through baking, until tops are golden brown, about 15 minutes. Transfer to a rack to cool completely.
Boom.
- Rob.
(Recipe adapted from the awesome Smitten Kitchen)
